Ok Sex

6 09 2008

X is good in bed. Really good in bed. I now have something to compare it to.

Last night I went to the frat I used to hang out at all the time last year. I talked to all my guy friends there and BFJ and I proceeded to get drunk.

C, is a guy who I’ve made out with a few times before. He’s cute in a grungy sorta way. Not really my type. Smokes too much, drinks too much, gets high too much. But whatever. He’s intelligent and funny and amusing to hang around.

To make a long story short, C and I ended up having drunken sex last night. And it was okay. Not good but not horrible. I’ll type up the story of what happened another time, but I’m still hung over.

All I’ll say is that X has spoiled me. He’s really good in bed. Or else C just isn’t. And I’m also spoiled by the fact that X has a big cock. Like 9 inches. C’s was 5 or 6 at best. The sex was still good, but it just wasn’t what I needed. Though I do have some nice marks on my neck right now.

And honestly, I get more turned on thinking about how soft BFJ’s lips were when we made out than sex with C. Oops.

And I’m still hungover. More sleep.

TMI: “Out” Magazine

13 08 2008

1. What is your favorite song to have sex to? None at all. For some reason I kinda just like silence when I fuck.
2. What is your vision of hell? Non-existent seeing as I’m not really sure I beleive in it. I mean, I guess my vision of hell would be more like limbo or purgatory rather than the ‘fire, brimstone, and eternal damnation’ thing.

3. In the film made of your life, who will play you? Adrienne Palicki or Natalie Portman
4. What is the one thing you most urgently need to tell your mom? To fuck off and let me live my own life.
5. What will be carved onto your tombstone? The typical shit. And anything else my family comes up with.
And the bonus: What is your drag name (which would be, first name: the name of your first pet; last name: the name of the street you grew up on)? Sasha Creek. Lol.

Mishap Mondays: Chair….Poor Chair….

11 08 2008

(The very lovely Zoe came up with the idea of making Mondays Mishap Mondays. I’m just going along with that because I think it’s a great idea.)

I feel kind of bad for the chair. I mean, it didn’t really do anything.

But to go to the begining, it was New Years. BFL and I were at a fairly big house party. We looked hot. And because we knew the host personally, we each had our own bottle of champange. That was Bad Idea #1.

Being the raging alcoholic I tend to be at parties where drinks are free, I armed myself with a Dr. Pepper and vodka, heavy on the vodka. By midnight I was trashed. I kissed BFL at midnight instead of a boy. But this boy started hanging around me. I don’t remember his name very well. Something with a J I think. Maybe? I don’t know.

He pulled me into the garage to play beer pong. We flirted drunkenly the whole time. The other team left after we lost miserably. He leaned down and kissed me. And then backed me up and lifted me up, pressing me against the garage wall. We knocked down some things. I don’t remember what. Probably garden tools or the like.

The rest of the night is fuzzy. I remember taking a hit off a bong. Throwing up and Boyperson holding my hair back. And then it gets clearer once I dragged him upstairs. There was a chair in the corner. He sat in the chair. I stradled him and we starting making out. And hands starting wandering. And hips started moving. And we hear a crack. Pause. Keep going. His hands are sliding under my shirt. His lips are on my neck.

And then suddenly there’s a crash and we’re on the floor. We broke the chair. It turns out, under examination the next morning while moderately sober, it was a wicker chair. Not very strong and a poor choice for fooling around on.

I feel bad for the chair. It was totaled. Crunched. Destroyed. We didn’t tell anyone. I don’t know if anyone ever really guessed why the chair in the unfinshed part of the upstairs was broken. Oh well.


Anyone else have stories about breaking furniture? Not beds. But chairs or tables or desks or couches?

3 times?!

30 07 2008

 I’ve always considered my best friend, we’ll call her BFL, to be a fairly sexual person.

I found out today that she’s only masterbated three times in her whole life. In NINETEEN years, THREE times. I was confused. How can you do that? And she’s open sexually, and she’s no prude. Which I guess is what surprised me.



THREE TIMES?!?!?!?!?!

Picky picky

28 07 2008

Alright, I admit it. I’m quite picky when it comes to men.

Which might be one of my biggest problems when it comes to finding anyone. It doesn’t help that I live in a pretty much dead city inhabited by wannabe ganstas and fat italian assholes.

Would you like a description of the last boy who offered to buy me a drink at the bar? He was about 4 or 5 inches shorter than me, reddish/brown hair, around twenty peircings in his ears, dressed like a gangster, with ratty cornrows and braids. He made K-Fed look good. Really good. I humored him and let him dance with me a bit, though I kept pulling his hands back to my hips as he tried to go lower. (you’ve gotta fit the bill before I let you go anywhere) After I finally got sick of him pawing at me, I did my patented detatch-hands-turn-to-the-side-I’m-done-dancing-now move. He leered at me, asked me how tall I was, then asked if he could get me a drink. I told him I was fine, not mentioning that I really didn’t feel like getting roofied that night.

Those are usually the type of guys that hit on me. Gag.

I like my guys tall, intelligent and just a tad geeky. X fit the bill perfectly, no lie. But very few people in my hometown could fall into more than one of those categories. Guys around here just are not tall. Instead of hot Italian and Greek studs, we get the short, fat, balding ones. Seriously.

I’ve yet to find a good place to pick up the hot/cute/geeky/tall boys. The bars around here just bring out the creepers. Anyone have any suggestions?  

just a note

21 07 2008

I need sex right now.

It’s so sad. But it’s been one week since I’ve had sex and I’m desperately horny. My sex drive is not good for a poor, single girl like me. If I had my way, I’d honestly have sex at least twice a day.

X and I actually had a fight once because I got mad at him for not putting out enough. Mind you, we were fucking at least four times a week, sometimes five or six. But I wanted to go two or three times a day and I didn’t have the balls yet to just push him down on the bed and tease him until he was ready to explode. I complained that he didn’t fuck me enough and he laughed incredulously and said he’s never met a girl who complained about ‘not enough sex’ usually it was ‘too much sex.’

I laughed at him that night. Too much sex? I said. Impossible.

drunken foam fun

17 07 2008


This is my first HNT post and it’s not very fun or very sexy or even very creative. But it fits in with this week perfectly. X ‘dumped’ me. No more sex for Z for a while. That means time to get totally and utterly smashed into oblivion.

This picture was taken when I was very, very drunk, totally soaked from both sweat and the foam on the dance floor and apparently posing while shoving my boobs in people’s faces. Yes, I do have more than one of these. Do I remember them being taken? Nope.

It falls under Half Nekkid, I suppose, for two reasons. One, you can’t tell in this picture but my outfit was quite lovely. Tight shorts so short they barely covered my ass, a tight halter that was cut down past my bra, and it all was soaking wet and sticking to me in wonderful ways. Two, I’m drunk, upset and vunerable, (though covering it quite well through my picture whoring). I caved that night and texted X. He told me that he missed me but not to text him again. It was too hard.

So Happy Half Nekkid Thursday and enjoy my bra showing, boob shoving, drunk photo.

snippets: two

10 07 2008

“So, what’s happenin?”

“Nothing much, I’m bored so I’m watching secret diary of a call girl.”

“Good one. Though why would you watch your home movies? Lol. Jk.”

“ Hahahaha. Funny.”

“You know you’d love to be a call girl.”

“Why do you think that baby? Lol.”

“Because you enjoy being pleasured. And you would enjoy getting paid for sex. Money+sex=WIN!

::hug:: Don’t kill me.”

“Hahaha, I’m not gong to. Why would I kill you?”

“Because some people would be insulted by that string of comments.”

“This is me, remember? I’m not insulted in the least. Honestly, I’ve thought it would be interesting to be one of those high priced call girls men pay to take to dinner and show off and stuff.”

“‘Stuff’ being ‘ravished at night by right old men who can afford to pay for me to spread my legs’”

“Something like that. Lol.”